Reply to what do SAHMs do once kids are in school?

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[quote=Anonymous]OP, there is the possibility of depression as others have mentioned and there is also the possibility that your spouse has a hard time organizing what seems like an eternity of unscheduled time.  When I stopped working full time I felt completely ungrounded.  I didn't know how I could possibly fill all the time up!  I did go into a bit of depression b/c I didn't have the obligations and routines that I eventually found.

Maybe you could have a talk after the kids go to bed about how you can work together to get everything done.  Then when you have a big list of things that need to get done, maybe spouse (with your help) can break them down into two things to do each day of the week.  Sometimes if you just get productive right off the bat in the morning, you can avoid getting sucked into internet nothingness all day.  Maybe your spouse is one who doesn't plan very well, but maybe she is good at following a plan that is laid out on paper.  There is a sense of accomplishment in crossing something off a physical list.

Now, to all those who are still attacking the SAHMs with the "is SOOO hard... boo-hoo-hoo" crap.... :  No one is saying that the SAHM gig is harder than trying to work out of the house AND do the house management.  Many of us are saying that we've done the WOH thing and it exceeded our personal thresholds for stress/sanity and while SAH isn't necessarily the greatest job ever, we have made the trade off b/c it works for our households.  If working out of the house works for you, that's fab.  Go for it.  When I was working full time, it wasn't the 45 hrs. at the office that was a problem, it was the other 10 hrs. of commuting time added on to that.  That's what resulted in so much stress for everyone.  Yes, DH stepped up and did his share at the time, but it still put a lot of pressure on everyone from Monday at 5:30 a.m. straight through to Friday at 5:30 p.m.

We all just do whatever works at the moment.  It's not a contest to prove that I'm more of a martyr than you or that you can do everything that I do and more.  I do plan to go back to work (hope that interview I did lands me a job), but it is with mixed emotions.  Neither the WOH model nor the SAHM model is perfect.  Too much stress in one, too little personal accomplishment in the other.  You can't win for trying, so it's best to just do whatever works for your family at any given moment (and suspend the competition with the women in the other camp).[/quote]

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