Reply to Holding kids back (June/July/August bday)?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I have an Aug daughter and she first was enrolled in a public kinder and then private kinder.

All kids are difference and few redshirt girls, but I am so thankful we did. DD is doing great in every aspect of elementary and is thriving as one of the older students in class.  She’s confident and doing well academically without it finding it too easy. We made this choice bc I was a very young child for my class and always felt like I was trying to keep up. Also, I’m a teacher. Older students tend to have less issues with executive functioning and overall do better in the classroom. Good luck, OP![/quote]

This may be a tangent, but if out of a classroom of, let's say, first graders, the only first graders who are really excelling and keeping up in terms of executive functioning are the ones who were either held back a year or the very oldest in the grade... then maybe it's not the children who are the issue, it's how the grade is being taught and how the children in the grade are being expected to act.

-Mom of a boy who started K a few weeks after turning 5, because he was smart and tall and social and ready, and is in the "advanced" ELA and math groups, who has to keep hearing from the teacher how he has trouble getting his right supplies out at the right times (this is something he needs to do himself without prompting throughout the day apparently) and how he has trouble sitting still 40 minutes into the 50 minute direct instruction ELA lesson.  Like, no shit lady. Make kindergarten expectations more age appropriate and then get back to me. [/quote]

The expectations are unreasonable if they are judging 5 year olds against 6-7 year olds who were held back and too old for the grade.  Your child was developmentally appropriate but those teachers were not good teachers and were unreasonable.  A 6 year old who is held back is less mature than a 5 year old going on time as they are held to a 5 year old standard which isn't developmentally appropriate for a 6 year old.  Your kid who is older isn't smarter or more mature, they are older.  [b]Smart kids will do well in any situation.[/b][/quote]

Spoken as someone with an incredibly shallow definition of “smart” as well as what it means to “do well”.

Tangent-mom, was this a public or independent school?[/quote]

It's baltimore county public, I'm just so frustrated that my kid who was (and is) by all accounts ready to start kindergarten is being made to feel less than, because he can't always meet the expectations of his not-very-nice teacher.  I get that covid plays a big role- they are sitting watching the lesson on a projector as the teacher is split between in person and virtual kids- but the lessons are so long, and there seem to be so few breaks, that it just sets him up to fail sometimes.  And a big part of it is his teacher- who doesn't mince words when kids struggle with executive functioning (I hear her snap at kids who are virtual to sit still, stop playing with their pencil, "am I going to have to send a message to your mommy asking her why you are so distracted today?", etc and I hear her say things to the in person kids such as "this is the SECOND TIME I have asked you to get out the BLUE FOLDER, Timmy.  I need all of you to listen more carefully it makes me sad when no one is listening to me!"[/quote]

That is very much a teacher issue.  Tell your kid when she threatens him with you, to tell him to tell her to send you a message.  Its very boring to have to sit there when she's droning on and and a little one is just watching a screen.  Even as an adult I'd get bored.[/quote]

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