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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]My friend married into a wealthy family. She was intimidated a bit at first but she is much as you describe your sister: beautiful, sociable, and a nice person. Men and women gravitate towards her.  When she was engaged, she was amazed that his family was so generous to her. She got all her china and silver at one shower. Her husband is handsome, successful and a super nice guy who has adored her since the first time he saw her.  Their two kids are also attractive, kind and smart. Her inlaws adore her because of all she has brought into the family, none of which is monetary since her family was middle class and she quit her career to accommodate his corporate moves and their children.  It's normal to feel envious, especially if it is your sibling. [/quote]

OP here. This is just like my sister. My mother is known for her exceptional grace and beauty. My sister luckily inherited her good looks and charisma. For as long as I remember she has always received positive attention from people. Men go crazy around her and women want to be her best friend. I do genuinely wish her well and love her. She's sweet and a kind person.

It's just super hard to not compare our situations because we grew up together in a tight knit family. We had the same group of friends, my mom dressed us in identical clothes and gave us the same haircuts. We even lived together as roommates until I got married. It just seems so odd that she got handpicked for a charmed life while I'll continue my financial struggle. Don't get my wrong, my dh is lovely and a sweetheart but we're just so average. Her dh is super smart and successful and comes from a rich but loving family. I just can't help but feel the difference in the quality of our dhs says a lot about who is a superior catch. And of course, she just wins. [/quote]

NP, I've finally kind of come to terms that my sister feels this way about me. She's shorter and heavier than me, but I think she's very pretty and seriously the funniest, wittiest person I've ever met. We're close and get along well for the most part, but every once in a while I can tell it's resentment bubbling up in the way she criticizes me, my lifestyle, my parenting, and even my husband while reminding me of my "good fortune that has nothing to do with your [my] actual merit." It's actually super hurtful, and after 30 something years, I'm tired of it, but I don't know what to do. My advice would just be mindful of it, and try not to let your jealousy manifest itself that could damage your relationship.

I'm going back over my own timeline and trying to remember if when I first met/married my husband if I talked about money a lot. I might have because it was all so novel to me, and I just wanted to marvel with someone who knew me. It wasn't bragging because I didn't even fully grasp the concept of the money or privileges. Give your sister some grace to adjust, and if it continues, I would speak plainly, and just say ... I'm super happy for you, but we're on two different pages financially right now and it's a bit hard for me to relate. Let's stick to topics where we can both be comfortable.

Good luck and congratulations to your sister![/quote]

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