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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I formula fed from day 1. I didn't want to breastfeed, that was my reason. When milk came I did try it a few times - after the bottle, just to understand what it feels like.

Pros of bottle feeding from my point of view - your baby gets consistent composition of nutrition. No crazy allergies or elimination diets because you ate smth or other.

In my case I had no help, husband went back to work after 1 week. BFing would have made me a zombie. As it is, I had to have a lot of coffee daily just to care for the baby and ate crap frozen meals. So I wouldn't have been a great source of nutrition.

DH was able to bond with the baby during bottle feeding and took 1 or 2 night feedings, which helped A LOT.

Negatives: I do feel some regret not having the full experience, it passes by so quickly, and I wonder if I would have bonded more by BFing. No way to tell, maybe it would have made me crazy under pressure and resentful. Another negative is that [b]DH had very strong opinions about everything feeding related - what brand bottle to use, what flow nipple, when to change nipple, etc.[/b] Arguments about these matters were exhausting. We argued about other non-food related issues too, but with BFing at least the feeding arguments would have been off the table.

On the balance, the baby is 18 mo now. He is very healthy, meeting all physical milestones and exceeding developmental ones. It may not be due to formula, but at least I know it didn't hurt anything.

These are my personal views based on the choices I made and resulting experiences. They may not apply to anyone else. Lastly, I found Cribsheet by Emily Oster to be a helpful reading, if you're looking for an overview of relevant research.[/quote]

Wth made him an expert on this stuff?[/quote]

He was every bit as much an expert as the PP, right? They both got their information about formula and bottle feeding from books and doctors and personal experience, yes? So why wouldn't DH be just as expert as the PP? [/quote]

PP here, with the expert DH.  It's true we got same info, but we did not research in same depth, I read a lot more during pregnancy, and I spent more time with the baby during maternity, like giving 5 out of 7 feedings daily early on. This gave me context of what best practices are and the observation data for the specific baby we had. While we got the brand of anti-gas bottles that I concluded was great, DH had very rigid approach to nipple flow. If the package said #2 flow speed starts at 4 months, he wanted to do it on the dot at 4 months. We tried and to me it was obvious to me the baby was not ready. He was a slowpoke drinker and faster flow nipple was kinda waterboarding him at that age. But DH was focused on 1) what instructions on the package said and 2) efficiency - he wanted to minimize time he spent on the 2 feeds he did. Not because he didn't want to be with baby but because he'd rather play with baby than sit with the bottle for x amount of time. DH has a bit of a rigid personality and had a lot of anxiety around being a first time parent. Getting fixated on these things made him feel like he is doing something productive. It didn't help that his mom was edging him on. Our pediatrician must have been sick of us the first year, because we did telemedicine very frequently and asked about all kids of small things, she was basically arbitrating between the two of us. Anyway, it was a hot mess, and BFing would have cordoned me off some of it, but definitely not all.[/quote]

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