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[quote=Anonymous]I don’t know. I am a DW and often the lower libido partner but have always had sex with my husband once a week even if I wasn’t really feeling it. I don’t think it is fair to marry someone and not have sex with them anymore and I would be devastated if my DH didn’t want to have sex with me anymore. Of course, it ebbs and flows. And we have certainly had fights about sex and frequency. But even when my kids were super little and I honestly felt completely indifferent to sex, I still had it, and enjoyed it once I did. It was just about making that mental space. My DH is a great partner and I think sex is an important part of life...very important.

Also, I have found my sex drive is much higher now that the kids are older and in fact, we are now having sex much more frequently and it is even better than when we started dating. (We have been married ten years and dated for three before that). It makes me sad to think of a life where sex was just off the table, for anyone. Don’t get me wrong, a lot of men are crappy partners, and they need to reframe their own role in the situation. But fundamentally I don’t see how anyone, DH or DW, can be okay with completely taking away their partners right to sex...for life. That really seems ok to people?

If a partner doesn’t want to have sex anymore, they should either offer to open up the marriage in some way, or fake it regularly, or some combination of both. (Or leave, if they are just not compatible). [/quote]

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