Reply to sister just told me about disturbing childhood events

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]
And maybe she's manipulative because she was traumatized... kids who have been traumatized, stop maturing at the age that the trauma occurred if they don't get therapy.
Did you know that?

That's a scientific fact.

[/quote]

[b]There are very few scientific facts.  Even fewer in the field of psychology.  This isn't one of them. [/quote][/b]

I'm not the PP, but I graduated from UC Psych - University of California, Berkeley.
I'm a licensed therapist, and one of the most common traits among children who've experience trauma (especially sexual trauma) is a lack of maturing after the trauma has occured; (unless, of course, that child is introduced into intensive psychological therapy (as opposed to general therapy) soon after the traumatic event(s).

But that's a great way to focus on the most inconsequential portion of the PP's post.  
Way. 🤖To. 🤖 Go. 🤖 Ro-Bot. 🤖

OP, as counselors, we come in contact with clients who are angry, heartbroken, dejecte,  helpless and are now feeling truly exposed for the first time in their lives, as their deep dark secrets have finally come to light.

Often times they'll feel defeated, disbelieved, discredited, dejected & rejected -- this sense of pain and loss is frequently realized in the forensic setting (often times can occur during a criminal investigation) but more often than not, will occur after they've built up the courage to tell on their accuser and are met with resistance -- which is essentially what you did, if I'm reading your story correctly.

You are going to do far more damage to your already vulnerable sister if you continue to speak to her from an uneducated and ignorant place and I'm sure that is not your intention.

*[i]ignorant is NOT being used as an insult, it's being used as a clinical descriptor. [/i]

Speak to a counselor, do your own research online & start there, OP.

However, until you become more enlightened with the actions and behaviors of children & adults who are suffering with untreated PTSD; I highly advise you to not communicate with your sister.

Family reunification, of course, is what we strive for, however until you're ready to do the [u]real[/u] work; which means allowing yourself to accept,  become informed & understand the knowledge you receive regarding sensitive subject matter (subject matter that you may not want to know about OR be ready to deal with) my advice to you is to keep communication with your sister to an absolute minimum (however, do let her know that you're not cutting her off, either).

You need to educate yourself about the behaviors of untreated victims of sexual trauma in childhood, before attempting to speaking with her again.

Do you mind if I ask... is your father still alive, OP?

[/quote]

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