Reply to Feeling extremely discouraged. A rant.

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]But this is precisely what I'm talking about. I don't even disagree with you -- this sounds frustrating and hard. But why are you working so hard to convince *me* (or any of the posters on here) that you are right? What will that get you?

What if I told you right now that you are 100% correct, your husband is the worst, and that I agree with you that he should take one of the jobs you have told him to apply to. How does that help you? Even more, say that tomorrow he woke up and said "Ok, fine. I will take one of these jobs." Would that solve your marital problems? Would you suddenly become happy and stop resenting him?[/quote]

Op here. I WOULD BE THRILLED! If he took a full time job making 80k. I would honestly be thrilled. Why? Because we could get some consistency back. Get back into a routine. He could gain back confidence. I would be extremely thrilled to see him put what's best for the FAMILY first. Rather than continue this selfish hold out for the pie in the sky job. I would legitimately be thrilled to see him have a schedule, a busy day, a routine, instead of laying in bed watching tv at noon. [/quote]

I'm an NP following along, and when I got to the PP's hypothetical job situation, where she thinks she's "catching you" being disingenuous about the cause of your rage, I shouted "OF COURSE THAT WOULD SOLVE THEIR MARITAL PROBLEMS, YOU DUMMY!"  PP is overcomplicating things.  Your posts have been so straightforward and sympathetic, OP, I don't understand why you've gotten so much pushback.

In your shoes, I think I'd give him a deadline to get a full-time job or else divorce.  He is destroying your marriage one day at a time.  You might as well rip the bandaid off.  But hopefully he'll get his head out of his ass in time.[/quote]

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