Reply to Wife resents me for not earning more

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP here. I’ve read and re-read the accusations that I’ve shifted my story, and I still don’t get it. We of course want all the same things in an ideal world...[b]I am just more compromising and realistic about what I am willing to give up.[/b] I’ll accept a house that’s not an aesthetic 10, I’ll accept a condo, I’ll accept solid but not 10/10 schools. That kind of stuff.

As for preschool...why is that such a bad example of diverging priorities? If preschool A checks all the basic boxes and is $1200 a month, but preschool B comes with bells and whistles and costs $1950 a month, that’s a 750 a month more for 2-3 years, which is very, very real money, and money that could be used elsewhere. That was a point of disagreement between us.

As for my willingness to apply to other jobs...sheesh. I often come into contact with financial regulator attorneys during the course of my work, and some of my work overlaps with them. I don’t currently have a competitive resume for it, but I see ways to get there (and to management where I work). I fail to see how I changed my tune on anything.[/quote]

You said straight up that you want a home with schools you love and a short commute, then turned around and said her lifestyle desires are driving your financial woes, citing specifically to a home in a good school district with short commutes.  Only when it's pointed out that you flipped the script to shove her under the bus, you suddenly are insisting you're fine with a condo!  The word condo never came up in a full day of posting, but here you are saying it proves you didn't change your story.  Mmkay.

Here's the deal: you stepped back to an easy job when you guys had astronomical SL debt and now she's stuck in a soul-crushing job because you have two kids.  You spent the first half of this thread saying you feel badly that your cakewalk job can't get you to your financial goals, and the second half (after people told you to adjust your expectations or apply for the job you insist you could get that would actually bring in more money) switching it up to "it's only her goals, she's so spendy, she is forcing me to look "in the good school, good commute neighborhoods in our city" (nevermind that that's exactly where you said you wanted to look until people told you to scale back) why does she need me to *rescue* her."

As for why preschool is not a good example of her profligate ways: every example of what you're willing to do without to avoid even applying for a better job comes at the expense of your kids.  Of course she's killing herself to provide for them; you don't seem to consider it your responsibility at all.
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Good god you are a psycho shrew. You have projected your own life on the OP to push an agenda. Take a xanax.[/quote]

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