Reply to Everything was great for 6 months and then family finds out and boom: he ends it. Advice?

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Reply to "Everything was great for 6 months and then family finds out and boom: he ends it. Advice?"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]A friend spent 8 years trying to become acceptable to her bf’s family. Including changing her fashion from regular to very modest, losing 50 lbs, and studying to convert to his religion. In the end, his teenage kids revealed that the issue was her RACE. Something she could do nothing about even if she wanted to. He confessed that he could not marry her or have her attend major life events because his kids’ marriage prospects were endangered. She had already marred relations with her own family over conversion. The worst part was that they worked together so she had to continue to see him every day after that. She eventually left for another firm. [/quote]

This is very common. Know what you’re dealing with and be wise enough to read the signs and see if they line up with the words and the actions. That is all people are suggesting OP do.

You aren’t changing cultural expectations, period. You respect them, and move on. Assuming they aren’t done threat to everyone else’s peaceful existence, their opinion is irrelevant to your need, and your opinion is irrelevant to theirs.

OP, there is an old movie produced be Spike Lee, an AA New Yorker known for starting mainstream awareness around a lot of cultural clashes that were common in a diverse community and some of the AA experiences. Jungle Fever comes to mind - about an Italian and AA romance that begins and how their entire world rejects them because of both families’ determination to remain racially segregated as a family. Add it to the list of movies to watch before you leave this earth to Rest In Peace. This happens all over the world. Maybe new themes with more diverse immigration and younger races being more progressive, but the tune to the song is the same.

Nothing new under the sun. Things change and things stay the same.[/quote]

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