Reply to Girlfriend Turned Down Offer

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "Girlfriend Turned Down Offer - She We Break Up?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous]It seems to me, OP, that you're rather inflexible. I get that she said she was okay with it, but 6 months is very soon and she is the one taking all the risk--not you. SHe is giving up a place to live, etc. If it doesn't work out, then what--she has to move out. I think she is being smart--I did move in with someone after about 6 or 7 months of dating in my early 30s and it didn't work out but I wasted a lot of time because it was going to be so much harder (we both moved but I was the only one on the lease, so I had to kick him out and then find a roomate or move out myself andbreak the lease, etc). when I met DH, I told him I would not consider moving in unless we had a commitment. We moved in together in november and were married (and pregnant) the following june.

Assuming you are madly in love with her and can't imagine life without her (which frankly it doesn't sound like), this is what I would suggest. Have this conversation clarifying whether she has had a change of feelings about you, or just about moving in. If the latter, date another 5-6 months. If you still want to marry her, and she you, get engaged, and live together during the engagement. Dont put deposits on anything for another couple months. Its a lot more secure for her to move in if there is a commitment on your part. If you move in and you're engaged and it doesn't work out, you break up then. But honestly living together doesn't really tell you that much more than what you know from spending a ton of time together. You learn a lot more if/when you are dealing with children, job losses, parents dying, moving, etc. And to get through those things, its not a matter of how someone loads the dishwasher or whether they are a morning or night person, its character, communication and commitment.

[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics