Reply to Am I Asking Husband To Do Too Much?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Whoa whoa whoa OP. Holy red flags. Your husband is “making” you pump? Drop it, unless it’s something YOU think is incredibly important (spoiler alert: it’s not). Now I understand why you seem so miserable. I don’t understand why you take care of the baby all day on the weekend too? You need to have a heart to heart with your husband. I work 60 hours a week and I put one of my two kids to bed every damn night and make dinner - I don’t really sleep so I don’t recommend this life - but I don’t push everything off on my husband who works 40 hours because I WANT to spend time w my kids. He is being a baby. Please don’t have any more kids with this man until you have created a more equal balance that works for you because trust me adding a second will be a dumpster fire. It’s a hard adjustment when mom can’t handle it all.[/quote]

OP here. Every time I talk about quitting or supplementing, he throws a fit. He says formula isn’t that healthy and it doesn’t have good ingredients. He will talk about all of the problematic ingredients until I just give in and tell him I will keep pumping.

He’s not always a jerk. He was wonderful before we had our child. He loves our child. He was wonderful while on paternity leave with helping with feedings, naps ( though baby was sleeping without needing to be held until 8 weeks), cooking, etc. Then he decided it was all on my because he works all day. He needs his weekends to rest because he works 50-60 hour weeks. I would be fine with during the week if he helped out on weekends, but he doesn’t. He thinks helping me while he was on paternity leave was enough. [/quote]

My kids are older and it has been awhile since I was at this stage but my two cents (1) it is your body and ultimately your decision when to stop pumping and move to formula. DH should have an equal say in other decisions but not this one- sorry, too bad. (2) things need to be 50/50 when DH is home- the end. This should always be the case regardless of who is on leave,etc. nights should be 50-50 as well...whether he has to work the next day or not (3) you should be able to get basic household things done with an 8wk old and do not need to hold the baby for every nap. Get a carrier. How much housework is there to do with one infant anyway?! other than laundry and washing all the breast pump stuff (UGHHHH hated that. And if DH wants you to continue pumping, make him wash all that stuff if you agree to continue. It’s the least he can do) [/quote]

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