Reply to Something Mil told Dd

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think you could use this as an opportunity to rethink your own views on family holidays, honestly. You clearly think of your family as yours and DH's as his, which fine, but your children are as equally your MIL's grandchildren as they are your own parents' and given the way you've written your complaint here, you don't seem to get that. It's undoubtedly hard enough that their own son isn't willing to try to make some of their larger family holiday get-togethers without a resentful, possessive DIL so aggressively privileging her birth family when there are now grandchildren involved. I get you're constantly irritated at your DH but yeah, I do think you should consider spending some actual holidays with your in-laws, even if only as a brief drop-in so they can see their grandkids, unless there are genuine other mitigating factors such as abuse.

And no, I'm not a MIL. [/quote]

I do not agree with this at all. I'd never spend a holiday at my inlaws w/o my husband. It's up to your DH to work it out with his parents. Or not. You do see them for the holiday, just not ON the holiday.

As for your DH, is he Dr. Evil or something? He cannot attend ONE holiday? That would absolutely not fly with me.[/quote]

+1. Wtf is wrong with all of these people who[b] expect the DIL to always travel to her ILs, with kids and no spouse, every holiday?[/b] His family, his problem. The recurring jealousy issues MIL has have surely resulted in more than just this one snide comment that alienated the DIL.

My take->OP's family should spend some of their holidays together, just them. Then move the FOO's to around but not on the actual day. 
[/quote]

I haven't seen a single comment suggesting that.  OP [b]never [/b]sees her in laws on holidays, and because she [b]always [/b]travels to her own family they cannot come see the kids at her house on the day either.  I don't understand the posters reacting to a grandma muttering "It's not fair" as if she called the OP every curse word under the sun.  It isn't fair!  It's true that it's her husband perpetuating the problem, but OP turning it into a personal slight and vendetta between her and MIL seems insane.

I bet if you lived just as close as your grandkids' other set of grandparents and they got every single holiday and you sometimes got a visit the following weekend, you'd do more than mutter about it once.[/quote]

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