Reply to Oldest son has a lot of animosity towards middle son

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What’s wrong with being nerdy that it’s an excuse to hate someone? I know it’s off topic but I don’t get it. [/quote]

All the nerds on dcum are taking this personally :roll: 
[b]In reality being a nerd covers for some unfortunate characteristics: socially awkwardness and lack of physical attractiveness, to name a few. I would also prefer for my child not to be a nerd.[/b]
In this particular case, i think OP's eldest is calling his brother a nerd only because he realizes that the middle one doesn't really have to do much to be accepted: which for him is not well deserved. They just have different temperaments and probably values. I can see it being hard for any parent.[/quote]

Nailed it. I don't know how much OP can do about it, except not favor anyone - treat them all as equal as possible, and if you stand up for one, you stand up for the other one.  Otherwise, they will grow up to resent each other. [/quote]

And this is why we read all the stories on DCUM about families being estranged and not getting along.  A parent who doesn't want the nerd for a kid, doesn't want the introvert and the kid knows it regardless how much the parent thinks they have hidden it.

The kids hate one another because the nerd is being bullied by the older brother and rejected and this will cause resentment to last a lifetime.  Say goodbye to family Christmas's together or holidays or any other important event.  It will always be stressful and volatile.

The oldest kid is a complete and utter brat who hasn't learned any empathy or how to tolerate different types of people and he is praised because he is popular.  Yes bullies can be popular but he may struggle in the real world when others don't like him for the mean person he is.[/quote]

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