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[quote=Anonymous]I knew there was some background other dynamic going on.  OP, just go worth the flow and try to connect with them.  Be grateful for this time. Sounds like you may not seem them again for a while?  No need to overly plan “wow” activities.  Follow their leads .  Maybe just a visit to Michael’s with $10 each would be fun.  Maybe not.  I do not know them.  One of my DDs would like this and one would not.  But here is what is hard:  follow THEIR lead and try to get to know them each as individuals and what makes them tick.  I realize you only have a short time with them and you truly have gone in with good intentions.  Just try to create a foundation for a continued relationship and hope it can grow from there.  I am sorry there is kind of a weird family situation going on but again I commend you for trying.  Hopefully, if nothing else, they can feel that if nothing else.  Just do not give off any whiffs of judgmentalism.  Just be there.  [/quote]

Op here. The Michael’s idea is a good one and giving them the money directly I like. On past outings I’ve given them a set limit and then they spend the whole time finding things over the limit and asking if they can have the more expensive thing. Maybe giving them the money would help and then staying out of it entirely.

I think it’s probably fair to say I am a little judgment of certain things. I know they need my love and acceptance and not my judgment but it’s hard. One example would be one of my nieces told me she wants to be a flight attendant when she grows up. I asked her why not a pilot? She said because that’s only for boys. Like, I can’t just let that go.

Another example is the walking thing. I just think it’s kind of silly for them to come so far just to sit on their iPads in another location. So I’m going to force them to get out at least once a day. I want to try and open up their world a little bit.[/quote]

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