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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote] But the modern day child psychiatry research indicates that the entire family be given age-approproate versions of the truth when parents divorce, rather than gaslighting them or leaving them to figure it out on their own.[/quote]

That was exactly what my mom did and it was a terrible approach, very damaging.

All we ever heard was “your father is an evil pig, the scum of the earth, an inhuman monster!”
“But why, mom?”
“Never mind why. Because I said so!”[/quote]

I was old enough to know when my father’s affair happened. I was very upset with him. But my mother stayed with him. Five years later - their relationship was very toxic (before and after affair) and he filed for divorce. She went scorched earth and our relationship was permanently damaged. 
As with most things in life... it’s always better to take the high road. 
Work on yourself and find happiness- no matter what side of that equation you’re on.  
Bad-mouthing, outing your cheating spouse to the world, trying to get your children to turn against the other spouse... it will all work against you. [/quote]

God forbid it never happens to you.  It causes mental break in many victims.  The cheater always plays good guy/gal to everyone else in the world.  They are usually 100% a different awful person to their spouse in private.  Then it’s “I can see why he/she did it.”  They’re gaslighting, nastiness and psychological torment literally makes people crazy.[/quote]

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