Reply to Giving your married child a down payment, then divorce

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Hi [quote=Anonymous]How about you match exactly what her parents are chipping in. [/quote]

Good equitable answer to the divorce dilemma.

I am a parent.  When younger, we had no parental help.  Still able to buy and sell 4 houses over last twenty years. 3 custom built.  We are 42.  Entering adulthood, you should pay off any student loans, retirement savings regularly and savings for wedding and house.  If not, both you and partner are not ready for life as one.  Sometimes gifts comes with opinions or indebtedness feelings.  I’d rather be free of that.  [/quote]

I echo all of this, and will add, don't forget the siblings.  If you are going to give to your children, make sure you give to ALL children equally. I mean, at least offer.  My MIL gave to one of her sons, didn't tell any of the other siblings until it came up in an extended family meeting with the financial planner.  Not cool MIL, not cool. She ended up giving the other siblings an equal check, but not until a lot of eyebrows were raised and questions asked.
I'm sure she had some concocted reason she kept it under the table, maybe she was trying to protect her son's pride, maybe she felt guilty for helping, I don't know.  Just make sure it's equitable. [/quote]

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