Reply to Who looks after the childless elderly?

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[quote=Anonymous]I know a family with 6 adult kids at war over caring for aging parents. The more prolonged the illness sometimes the more likely things dissolve into war of people guilt tripping eachother and manipulating to get out of any responsibility. I know of several estrangements that occurred over eldercare. It's complicated and there are no easy answers. Kids are not an insurance policy. After going through the trauma of it all myself with a parent who declined over many many years and all the emergencies, I want to do what I can to protect my own kids from that stress while they deal with their own children and taking care of their health. The first few years were manageable, but after that it really took a toll on my health. I hope we have a system like some other countries where I have the power to chose how it ends. I would like a peaceful goodbye with my loved ones making sure they know my wishes are no guilt, just love and good memories. I would rather my money go toward their emergencies-job loss, hospital bills and toward their vacations and retirement rather than paying someone to wipe my tush and change my tubes. I want my end of life ceremony to be a celebration, not a bunch of people blaming eachother for not doing enough or people feeling burned out from all they did.[/quote]

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