Reply to I have ONE standard for men. Am I asking too much?

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "I have ONE standard for men. Am I asking too much?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]One standard: be an ADULT.

This means:

Have and keep a job. It doesn’t matter what it is. Blue collar, white collar, self employed. Just have a job.

Pay your own bills. You don’t need to pay mine, just yours.

Take some pride in your home residence. It doesn’t have to be a luxury condo or house. Even if you live with roommates to save money. Make your bed, do your dishes, and please don’t live in a basement with a room that only has a mattress on the floor, dirty clothes, an Xbox, and Dorito crumbs everywhere.

Take some pride in your appearance. It matters less to me if you are overweight, shorter than average, or how chiseled your bone structure is. Have good hygiene and don’t dress like a slob. I don’t care what you wear at home or just going about, but please iron a fresh shirt for our first date.

Treat others like adults. Take responsibility for your actions and respect people’s time and energy.

WHY is it that this is so hard to find? It seemed like all of the men around 30ish who aren’t already snatched up aren’t ADULTS. [b]WHY does everyone who asks me out on a date a basement dwelling gamer??[/b][/quote]
In life, you don’t attract what you want.  You attract what you are.
You attract immature irresponsible guys because you’re a whiny little brat (immature) who is always blaming everybody and everything for her problems and never bothers to look in the mirror (irresponsible).[/quote]
This.

You’re literally dumping guys and not giving them a chance because...they didn’t iron their shirt that day or because you went to hook up with them in your first date and they didn’t make their bed because they probably weren’t expecting to hook up yet.

You say you have one expectation and you have a laundry list of issues, many of them being very minor.

If you’re that picky because you don’t have a guy who looks like he’s in a J Crew catalog to showoff for your instagram friends, you’re going to end up being a single cat lady the rest of your life.

Maybe...give people a chance? Or look inward at your own self issues?[/quote]
I don't get the sense that it was just one thing (non ironed shirt or bed not made), or just one time.

Not OP... [b]but I do think there are plenty of men out there who are slobs and don't make any effort to make themselves attractive, then get all bent out of shape when women don't want to date them[/b].[/quote]

And women don’t do the same? After a few weeks/months, the makeup stops being put on and the sweatpants start coming on. [/quote]
Difference here is that OP is stating that the men whom she is finding to date are slobs from the beginning, not after a few weeks/months of dating.  Sweatpants are fine if you have been going out for a few months, and you are having a chill night at home, watching a movie.  When DH and I were dating, after the first couple of  months, we had lots of chill nights at home; sweat pants, lay on the couch, watch a movie, get intimate.

But, he and I at least put some effort into our appearance the first couple of weeks when we started dating.  We got comfortable with each other pretty quickly.  I don't mind the sweatpants, just not on the first few dates.  It just seems like the person doesn't want to make any effort, and that IMO sets the tone for the rest of the relationship.  [/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics