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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]It's hard to know if OP would have had issues at 30. What is clear is that she followed him  from 1-2 year gigs moving multiple times when all signs pointed to the fact that he was not succeeding as an academic. 5 years between phd and tenure track first job is concerning and most phds I know who didn't get TT soon after finishing or one prestigious post doc saw the writing on the wall and left academe  Remember, this is not about waiting to get tenure , in which case it might make sense to  delay having a baby. For in fact  it's tremendous pressure over the next 7 tears after starting a tenure track job to actually get tenure---it would have made more sense to have a kid early on in the adjunct/postdoc years and focus once he was on the tenure track.. Someone more realistic would have had a plan B (get a job in industry) but it sounds like OP's husband only cared about pursuing academe, not his wife or having a  family. It should never be a unilateral decision and it sounds like they didn't really talk about their absolute priorities  before marriage. His was getting a tenure track job above all else, hers was having kids.
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Agree. The next 7 years trying to get tenure will be brutal. He's still going to prioritize his career. Get the divorce.[/quote]

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