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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Mine is the most common of problems.  I want to have better and more frequent sex and intimacy, she wants to be left alone.  We used to schedule once a week, or so (worked out to 2-3x a month) but most of the time she clearly would have preferred to be left alone.

So after years of this dynamic, I have backed off.  Going on 4 months, no sex.  At first, it really, really sucked but now I really don't miss sex with her.  Definitely less resentment, ironically.  She has mentioned about scheduling it again, but I am skeptical this is anything but her feeling guilty about not doing something I used to push for.

Question - do women regain libido if they are left alone for a while?  Meaning, can desire rebuild over time?  Anyone successfully used a long sex break as a positive step?[/quote]

It helped me a lot.  We were scheduling sex and it was a chore that I had to do.  It wasn't pleasurable for me, but it wasn't awful either.  It was just a thing that had to be done, like dishes or laundry.  DH decided to back off.  It freaked me out for a little bit. He continued to flirt a bit.  One thing led to another and my sex drive rekindled.  We now have sex 1-2 times per week.  I enjoy it a lot.  It's not an obligation now; it's something that I want.  If I don't feel like it, we don't do it.  Ironically, I feel like it more often. [/quote]

It's not really ironic, having sex often leads to desiring more sex. Not having sex often leads to a sort of hibernation effect. [/quote]

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