Reply to paying for "extras" on top of child support

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]They usually have one pay more in alimony as there are tax breaks and other benefits to that vs. paying child support.  It is crazy high and my husband was doing the same.  His ex actually took him to court as she got greedy and wanted my income and a lot more and it turned out the court took two kids off of child support, stopped the alimony - he continued to pay the same amount as it wasn't worth the war in court after it was over, and the child support was reduced.  PLUS, he got more visitation & phone contact.  While it sounded great, there is nothing to do to force the contact/visitation so that only lasted as long as court had monitored the situation and as soon as it closed the case, no contact and just money demands.  (We stopped all extra's and said if the child needs something to send us a list and we will buy it/mail or send the money directly to the school.  She wanted to play up the dead beat dad who isn't helping so if he did things directly it wasn't ok with her so she stopped asking.  I love how there is an office to enforce child support/money BUT there is no office to help with visitation/contact and other issues that equally impact children (except the costly route of hiring an attorney and when you pay child support, alimony, extras and need something to live, who can pay that).[/quote]

There is an office to enforce vistiation it is called court. The more I read this crap the less and less likely I am to even ask for suport. Sheesh! Just keeping the stupid out will make out lives better. [/quote]

Court is not an office for enforcing visitation.  It is court!  It is very expensive.  Clearly you haven't had to fight just to see your child.  A custodial parent can go to the office for child support and file for free.  They will (ok, they aren't great but try) take care of everything and enforce that it gets paid.  AGAIN, it is free to make sure the CP gets there money.  If a parent doesn't get their visitation, they can't simply walk into an office for free and say, hey, my ex will not let me see my kids.  I pay full and above child support and all I ask for is to be a dad/parent.  You have to hire an attorney and come up with usually several thousand upfront and beg for visitation and then maybe the CP will allow visitation.   If they don't, they rarely hold a CP in contempt or throw them in jail, like they would for failure to pay child support.  NCP's/Fathers are basically only good for money! (except for the rare wonderful CP's who encourage the relationship)[/quote]

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