Reply to paying for "extras" on top of child support

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]10:31 You sound very angry and resentful. You are really emotionally invested in the details of DH's alimony and child support. If it's as effed up as you describe, why doesn't DH renegotiate? Isn't there an annual recalculation? Is DH secretly fine with his generosity, and you resent that?[/quote]
10:31 here. I am angry and resentful that she has portrayed my DH as unsupportive of the kids. She has told him not to disclose the financial arrangement, although she has told the children that they can't have this or that because she gets so little in child support. It infuriates me that his relationship with his children has been undermined because they think he pays very little in child support. And technically - it is true - he pays little in child support because her attorney recommended high alimony and low child support (I have no idea why...). The court completely went with her attorney's recommendation. But its not like she's not getting any money.
He did attempt to renogiate twice. Once before we were married, he tried for joint legal custody at appeal, and he was denied because his lawyer never told him he had to arrange for an in-home visit from child welfare or something. Then, we renogotiated when the oldest turned 18 3 years after the divorce was finalized. She slow rolled it for a year. We ultimately "won", but it cost us more in legal fees than we gained in lowering the child support. So we will not touch it again.
I am all about supporting his children. I just think alimony is a farce, and is the way she chooses to paint him out to be unsupportive by (accurately) stating he pays little in child support, while leaving out that she makes a ton from him in alimony. She once told the kids they had to move because she couldn't afford the house because of him (she could afford the house, she just wanted to move in with her boyfriend).  So yes, call me angry and resentful. 
I hope one day they realize that he is not un-supportive.[/quote]

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