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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Did you apologize?

Seriously, that goes a long way with kids.  With everyone, really.

We're human and we make mistakes.  Even parents.  It's ok to admit that to your DD and to apologize honestly and directly -- and it's actually a good model for her, because she's also going to screw up plenty and will need to know how to apologize and repair relationships, too.

[b]Something like:  "I'm so sorry I flipped out about your XYZ grade last week.  I realize I completely overreacted, and I feel awful about it. Please know that I don't expect you to be perfect -- none of us can be, myself included.  Hell, you just saw me flip out over an 84, so clearly I make mistakes, too!  Anyway, I'm sorry about that.  I know what I said was hurtful and wrong, and I know I can do better than that."[/b][/quote]

This! This!  100 times this!  I can't believe you flipped out over a single 84% and then come in asking how to make her high achieving again.  You need to read over what the PP said, really absorb it and say it back to your daughter.  Everyone screws up sometimes and kids need to know that a mistake here and there isn't the end of the world.  The best thing we can do for perfectionist children is show them that stumbles will happen along the way, but it's OK.  That's not the direction you are going right now and I am sad for you and your daughter.[/quote]

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