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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Ultimate hypocrisy. “The future is female” - so I’ll stay home while a man pays. [/quote]

I had a lengthy conversation with a sahd yesterday. Feel better?[/quote]

Was he at home with a son, a woman supporting them both, and crowing “the future is male!?”

I’d say no different were that the case.

If you don’t see the irony in that quote from the article, I can’t help you.[/quote]

When one person takes care of the children and homefront, that allows the partner to work, including travel, unfettered by childcare and other home-based concerns. There is huge value in that, and it’s the partnership that allows it. They are [b]both[/b] supporting the entire family unit. No irony.[/quote]

Maybe in some SAHM situations. In my case, [b]I see my child as my daytime occupation.[/b] If I throw in laundry or dishes, fine, but I’m not home slaving away at the house while DH sits back. He gets home and helps with dishes and laundry and takes the trash out we hire cleaners to come once every 2-3 weeks so neither of us has to scrub toilets. Once DH isn’t home for the night, child duties are split between us, most of the time more heavily in DH’s direction as he often does both bath and bed. [/quote]

Meant to say once DH *is home* for the night, childcare is split... I wouldn’t say DH is unfettered by child and home concerns. [/quote]

What I meant by that is that the partner earning an income can travel for work, stay late for meetings, head to the office when a kid is sick, not have to come home to meet a contractor, etc. Unfettered in that sense.[/quote]

This attitude is ridiculous. The kid is not a lump of clay. A child should not be a "datime occupation". This mindset is an issue. Staying home is not. Moms like this are honestly creating monsters and a real PITA themselves. Its not rocket science and hell yeah, you should be doing the laundry. How TF would you not have the time? I have WOHM, SAHM and worked partime and so has my spouse and the one home with the kid does this stuff. That is how it is done. No, it is not fair to refuse to do household chores when you are not earning any income because your child is an "occupation". GTFO yourself.[/quote]

What? I merely said if I have time to put in laundry or wash dishes, I do. If we are doing some special activity and we are out all day, I don’t stress about it. DH and I both do light cleaning at night or if one of us is home. I just said I’m not slaving away at home at housework. I’m not sure how this is so offensive to you. I do choose to stay at home to primarily be with y kid, not so my house can look perfect all the time. [/quote]

It is not offensive to me, but moms who insist that they are OMGEnriching their childrens' lives all day every day by staying home and SOBUSYHARDESTBESTJOBEVERAMIRITEWHONEEDSACLEANKICTHENWHENTHEREISLOVINGANDEDUCATINTODO generally suck and raise aholes. I speak from lots of experience. I prefer a mom who stays home, shuts up about it, and can handle keeping her house clean. [/quote]

I think you’re reading into my post. Maybe “occupation” wasn’t the right word? I see DH’s work as his occupation during the day and the kid as mine during the day. It’s my responsibility to watch and take care of the kid, I don’t see myself as an automatic housekeeper and cook, though of course I do clean when I can and cook. But I don’t see housekeeping as my job. I do all the grocery shopping and I’m certainly not letting dishes sit for days in the sink, but I’m not going to be dusting and vacuuming daily and folding all of DH’s laundry all day just because I am home. I’ll do some of it, but no I do not see that as the reason I am staying home. [/quote]

Well, as far as I am concerned, I do expect the person I pay to watch my young children to take them to play dates, the library, make food, clean up, and do their laundry and that is standard. It is what I expected and did myself when I was at home. If you "don't care about that stuff," I would posit that it is part and parcel of child rearing. Old fashioned and inconvenient, but children need clean clothes, spaces, and nutritious food as much as they need baby class time.  [/quote]

Do you really think I’m sitting back and taking my kid to story time and not cooking meals or washing his clothes? I understand your point about some SAHM but that’s not me. I’m merely saying that I’m not bending over backwards to do all the housework while DH is at work. I do tend to do all the kid laundry and towels, but DH also grows in our communal laundry when he is home and I often fold at night while watching TV. During the day of course I wipe up after my kid and I eat lunch, and vacuum as messes are made, but I am not cleaning as a cleaning crew or housekeeper would all day, nor do I see that as my job. I was originally responding to a PP who said a working DH would be completely  “unfettered” by housework and childcare concerns, and I don’t think that’s the case in my house. [/quote]

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