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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Don’t expect anyone (including DH) to get anything done while watching a toddler. He is also likely depressed or at a minimum facing a severely bruised ego because he isn’t getting interviews.  Let things like the x-box go.  What is going to happen if the lawn waits for another day?  You have a 1 year old...this is survival time. Not everything has to get done now.  For those that do, make a list, discuss it with DH rather than being a martyr and just doing it with a huge chip on your shoulder.  You sound very controlling and judgmental.  Flip it around, you get to sit at your desk, talk to coworkers, likely search the internet while DH is dealing with a 1 year old. Trust me, work is easier.  [/quote]

I am about 50-50 on this. ... There's no question that he isn't making the best use of his time -- while the 1-year-old naps, he should be calling the plumber to set up an appointment, and he could even cut the lawn if it's not too much. When the 1-year-old is awake he could go get the drycleaning taken care of or take the car in for the tire fix.

However, being home with a 1-year-old is EXHAUSTING, and it's harder on a man. I can't tell you all the sexist things I used to hear when I'd be out with my toddler "Oh, is it Daddy's day with Annie today?" I would simply explain that every day is Daddy's day with Annie. Most of his friends, probably all of them, have jobs and careers and I suspect he is clinically depressed.

But keep in mind that there were many, many days I would have traded places with my wife in a minute when she would complain about the stress at work, or god forbid the business trips. Not interested in how busy that trip to San Francisico was while I was cleaning up vomit in the car and dealing with a sick toddler at home.

So I would say a) understand that his caring for your child has value; b) try to point out how he can make better use of his time; and c) most importantly, I'd have him try to be seen my a mental health professional, if only to vent or be diagnosed for possible depression

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