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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]“White parents were accustomed to having their kids shine at everything without working hard. Then, people came along who worked harder and won everything. Rather than developing a work ethic and investing more time into activities, the white parents complain about Asians prepping and "ruining their children's childhood" with too much school. This sentiment is very obvious if you read the AAP forum. There is a huge cultural divide at play, since Asian families are more impressed by work ethic while white ones are more impressed by natural aptitude. ”

White mom here. Yes you are right. I want my kids to have a childhood that does not feel like drill school. I also am not a fan of travel sports teams for most kids as they seem ridiculous over investment of time/money vs enjoying playing the sport for fun.

I do not want to be in an atmosphere where my kid needs to drill for hours to keep up with the top vs doing a normal amount of work and letting aptitude help them along.

I do not think those other parents are bad parents. I just do not want that environment for my kids. We picked a more “normal” (for America) school zone and are happy with the non-extreme level of competitiveness. [/quote]

NP here.  I agree with you.  But, you don't have the right to enforce your standards and your choices on other families.  If you want a more relaxed atmosphere, then you should be fine if your child is tracked out of the advanced classes.  The advanced classses would be for those children who are advanced.  There is room for the advanced classes, the good ahead/at grade level the average and the remedial level.  If your atmosphere where children enjoy more of their childhood means that your child is tracked out of the advanced classes, then that is your choice.  Those families who want to give their children more tutoring and more educational workouts are no different from the families that want their children to excel at music or sports.  There are families who spend a lot of time and money on music instruction to ensure their child makes it into music competitions. There are those who spend time and money on trainers and gym memberships and facilities so that their child can be an advanced skater or track star or football star or gymnastics star.

If you are going to restrict outside training and tutoring in the academics, then you better be prepared to do the same for athletics and artistic training and tutoring.  And while I agree that you shouldn't force children into this stressful training and tutoring, I don't agree that you should restrict other families from making those choices.  And if that means that your naturally gifted but untutored child falls into the good but not advanced classes, so be it.

What gets me is that the families complaining are ones who have smart or naturally gifted children who they feel entitled to be at the top and in the best classes, and they feel that the top classes and most advanced classes should be defined by their children, not defined by other children who are more educated than theirs.[/quote]

I am not talking about banning those families from supplementing. But the school should not expect - and set advanced class requirements - to align with kids needing to do ridiculous amounts of cramming. Homework yes, studying of course. But not extra schooling at home to the point the kids have a double shift. If that means the kids who are also “home schooling” or study centering on top of the school day are board,well they can stop spending every blessed hour studying or they can go private.

I also strongly agree with a PP above who said that the parents who dislike the shift in school environment have every right to complain. Now that said,again I am the PO that kept this I mind when house hunting and I a happy with where on the spectrum our schools fall in terms of competitiveness vs kids getting to be kids. [/quote]

this is so hilarious. I'm going to cut and paste it the next time some white parent complains that their "advanced learner" is not receiving "differentiation" at their Title 1 school. [/quote]

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