Reply to Parents are NOT notified by the college if the child gets in trouble, e.g. drugs, alcohol in dorm?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What a nasty group of people on this thread.  Why belittle, insult and demean someone asking a legitimate question about the potential welfare of their kid?[/quote]

Yeah, it’s some ornery people in this world and even more who are just plain apathetic.  Guess parents need to stop babying their kids til they’re 25 and instead prepare them to function on their own to avoid the harsh realities of life in a world where nobody is inclined to baby their legally adult kids for them so they better be able to take care of themselves.[/quote]

Do you have no friends.

Because I’m an adult and when I am going through this “harsh world” I am 100% not doing it alone.

What a sad and pathetic life you sound like you have.[/quote]

I have friends, yes, and more importantly (and more relevant to this post) I have instilled and reinforced honesty, compassion/respect, responsibility, accountability, and courage in my kids along with the knowledge that their personal welfare in this world basically boils down to their decisions.  I’ve awakened them to the fact that mommy and daddy aren’t Wonder Woman and Superman and we aren’t going to be able to come flying in to save them in their adulthood so they have to save themselves by staying out of trouble in the first place.  Maybe my perspective is different since as African-Americans we have to start preparing our kids for a harsh world that doesn’t care about them as early as their elementary years.  I wish we had the privilege of expecting everyone to take care of them as we would and expecting every environment they venture into to see them well into adulthood as babies to be pampered and protected like we do, but sadly we don’t.[/quote]

You have instilled in your kids that her parents won't provide moral support in the face of a tragedy and they need to take care of it themselves because they are "adults" ..... that is a sad. Seriously lady. Your post sounds manic.

Maybe your community could create more safety nets and not let kids sink or swim. It's not a recipe for success.  [/quote]

Your insinuation is obtuse and overreaching but I would expect nothing less.  Draw whatever idiotic conclusions you wish about me based on erroneous assumption but bear in mind I’m not the one panicking about how ill-prepared my child is for adulthood.[/quote]

You are self righteous and I'm not the 1st to tell you this.

I obviously hit the nail on the head or you would not come back so strong. [/quote]

The only thing that is obvious is your animus towards anyone who dares dissent from your opinion.  And if I were as fond of foolish presumption as you I would argue that you also seem irritated by educated and empowered African-Americans, but that’s neither here nor there in relation to this discussion.  There is no question that communication is vital to all relationships whether personal or professional and while I would hope that a university would communicate to me as a parent about the unfortunate incidents and inappropriate activities of my college kid, I don’t expect it.  And that is exactly why I stress the importance of open communication with my child so that they are encouraged and inclined to share anything with me.[/quote]

There is no reason a safety plan can be in place.

And you have been more lucky than skilled at your parenting.

Hope your luck doesn’t change but if I does I hope it comes with some personal growth.[/quote]

Suppositions about my lot in life aside, when there is no policy present mandating that mommy and daddy be alerted for every infraction and circumstance then the burden of ensuring parents are made aware of situations that occur is on the student.  With that in mind there is a conjunctive burden on parents to reinforce open communication with their child so in the event something occurs the student is inclined to alert mommy and daddy of occurrences no matter how painful or embarrassing or distressing or objectionable.[/quote]

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