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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I agree that "shoulds" for second kids are so strong that many parents want to stop at one and don't. [/quote]

Seriously?  Who gives a flying fuc% with other people think?  I cannot imagine that anyone decides the size of their family based on what others think they should do.  I would never respect someone like that.  I have two because we both wanted two.  I don't have a single friend who has more or less kids than they wanted, other than for reasons due to infertility, death of a child, etc.[/quote]

This is me.  We have one (he's still little, just turned one) but I feel like we *should* have another, and I am trying very hard to weed through my feelings about what I want versus what I think we *should* do.  But it has nothing to do with what other people think.  It's about what is best for us, our son, and how we'll feel later.  Both DH and I have siblings with whom we have great relationships and I want that for our son.  I am surprised every day how much I love being a parent (I was on the fence about that for a long time) and would love to be able to have that with another child.  But man it would make our lives SO much harder, financially, emotionally, time-wise, you name it.  And DH is very content with just one.  I'm very afraid of not having a second and regretting it later, which is why I am fighting with the "I should have another" mentality.

[/quote]

+1.  The "should" came from us, not from others.

#2 is now 3 years old.[/quote]

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