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General Parenting Discussion
Reply to "It takes a village and I have no village"
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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP seems to have a weird, surfacey understanding of how intimacy develops. It's not through sending care packages or hosting game nights! It's through actually ASKING people (in person!) for help, and showing up IN PERSON for them, and talking about what's actually going on in your life. And you also have to work to find that person who's willing to open up to you in that way as well. If I saw that an acquaintance who I had never really talked about life with was posting on FB asking for a ride home from the hospital ... I'd probably take a step back, because that's a bit odd? But if you emailed or send a group email, I'd do what I could to help. [/quote] I'm quoting this separately, because I think it makes a good point. Social events are fine, and they can be the starting point for friendships, but they aren't the same thing. If you want to build those kind of connections, you have to reach out to people. They can't read your mind (and they might not have read your FB post). You email someone and say that you are having surgery, and since your husband is out of town, you'd like it if they could check in with you over the weekend to make sure you're okay. Or whatever. But you ask for things that are reasonable, and you ask people directly. And giving people Mother's Day gifts who are not your mother is just weird. [/quote]
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