Reply to It takes a village and I have no village

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]OP, I felt this exact way so many times.

Yesterday almost did me in. My husband had food poisoning and was up all night. We have a 7.5 month old who is getting over double pink eye, an ear infection and a cold. He is on antibiotics that he doesn’t like the taste of and tries to spit them out when he’s not coughing so hard he’s throwing them up exorcist style. I had major events at work that I felt couldn’t be missed.

It was a really hard day. I worked a 13 hour day on 3 hours of sleep and got home to be right back “on”.

[b]Raising kids without the village is so tough[/b]. I found consolation in now knowing I can be this strong if I have to be but I also need to do my due diligence and plan ahead. I am a planner and usually it helps avoid all of the mess. That doesn’t replace the village.

Keep trudging ahead. You will find your people! [/quote]

Curious what you think the alternative is.  To have someone take care of your sick kid when you got home from work?   Like an aunt, grandparent, etc?  I think you’re clueless if you really think there were previous generations of women (or laughably men) willing to come over to take care of your kid with double pink eye and a cold.  No way.  The main difference is as an UMC woman, you wouldn’t have had a job.  [/quote]

NP. I don't know why you think the PP is 'clueless'. My mother worked when we were young,[b] and she could depend on relatives/neighbors to help when necessary. [/b]Most families at that time could.[/quote]

[b]I disagree.[/b]  Most likely your mother’s neighbors had her own children.  Was she going to just leave hers at home alone while she came to watch your sick child?  Sorry but I just don’t buy that neighbors and friends were helping to this extent.   I actually don’t understand what OP even needs help with.  Neighbors can’t help her husband feel better or her child’s pink eye heal.  I’d say that children decades ago were more independent and could be sent outside when another child was sick, but I really don’t think neighbors were coming by to watch sick children.

[b]I think OP is another example of a millennial with poor coping skills.  Kids get sick.  Husbands do too.  It’s called life.  [/b]

[/quote]

What do you mean you disagree? I related the experience of my family and those of other families in my neighborhood. There's nothing to disagree about. This was, and is, the situation in many places where people rely on each other. No-one, including OP, was suggesting that a friend/relative should stay home from work to help her. However, people do help each other after work or on weekends.

Just because people are struggling to cope with life and you aren't, doesn't make you superior, PP. My mother was born in 1941, and she also struggled to cope some days. Why do you think so many women in the past had their little "mother's helper" each day? They lived in a time where women couldn't say they were struggling. To ask for help IS actually a sign that you are strong. You seem to be strangely hostile to the concept that in some cases friends/relatives are willing to help. In my case, some of them were single, some were married with young children, and some were married with grown children.
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