Reply to Estrangement Doesn't Just Happen to "Bad" Moms

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Reply to "Estrangement Doesn't Just Happen to "Bad" Moms—It Happened to Me Too"

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I will not regret cutting my mother off.  The last thing she said to me was that it was my daughter's fault that she was molested by my mother's boyfriend because she came on to him.  My daughter was 7 when he started.  My mother went back to him when he got out of jail.

"Deeply flawed" doesn't even begin to scratch the surface of her narcissism.  She was abusive to me all of my life except for the stretches where I refused to talk to her.  I reopened communications 3 times in my life but I will not do it again.

She 'doesn't understand what she did wrong', and of course I am a sociopath for cutting her off, and my daughter is a sociopath for lying about her abuse.

If I had followed my instincts and never started talking to her again, my daughter might have been spared.

You sanctimonious 'children are just so mean to their parents and should forgive them' types can stuff it.[/quote]

I don't think that anyone would argue that the mother shouldn't be cut off in the scenario that happened to your daughter. I am sorry that happened to your family.  But the case the author discusses is far different.  Supportive parent, no signs of abuse, just a sudden estrangement that no one is willing to articulate.  [/quote]

Oddly enough, that's exactly what my mother says.  She did nothing wrong, she has always been supportive of me, I just stopped talking to her.  AND took my daughter away.  When my mother tells the story, she has always been a loving, giving person, and I am just ungrateful.  I don't go around telling my daughter's story to people who know me because it isn't my story to tell.  When she decides she's ready, I'll support her.  Until then, I get to put up with all the people in my life who don't take 'my mother said something unforgivable, please stop asking me to talk to her' for an answer, because 'SHE'S YOUR MOM'.  No, she's a narcissistic mess.  My point is that you don't actually know what happened in that family, but you/others are defending the mother just because she is the mother.  I'm just here to say that just because she's the mother, doesn't mean she isn't lying, so maybe back off of the 'but sheeeeee's diffffferent' malarkey.[/quote]

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