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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Unless husbands are total assholes I have trouble understanding women who don’t occasionally have sex even if they aren’t in the mood. My libido is lower than my DH’s, he’s a good partner and a great dad. Sometimes he’ll initiate and while I’m not in the mood I can “fake it till I make it.” I don’t fake orgasms but I can be an enthusiastic partner even if I’m not initially into it. I do it bc it’s important to him and I love him.[/quote]

I've done that for a while and it didn't work. For the last couple of years in our marriage, I had sex with DH whenever he asked, regardless of how I felt.  What happened was at the end of two years, I became utterly numb sexually.  I orgasmed just fine with self-pleasure but DH's touch felt like nothing even when he tried. I guess that was because I came to think of myself as a provider of sexual pleasure and not its object.

So I stopped completely.  Took a long break.  Decided that I am never having sex again unless I feel like it.  It doesn't have to be throat-clutching but if I don't feel even a tiny spark of desire, I don't hesitate to say no.  It did wonders for my libido to be allowed to run free again. [/quote]

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