Reply to Why do people care if adult children receive help from their parents/family?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not really jealousy so much as it's kind of sad that an adult still needs help from their parents, especially if you grew up without anyone helping you. Sure, I'll help my kids out if they really really need it, but if they just want nice things and can't afford it and expect me to pay for it, then no.  Live within your  means.  That's the best gift I can give them.. to be self sufficient as an adult and knowing how to live within your means.[/quote]

You are missing it. I am a poster upthread gifting my kids either a paid off house or a very large down payment. It will not be because they "really really need" it. It will be because I want to and because I was given a great head start by my parents, who set me up for success, I'm going to give my kids that same gift. I hope they don't really really need it. I just KNOW what an advantage young adults have whose parents pay for 6 years of their education and help them buy their first home.

I'm an American Jew and this is actually pretty normal in my community for those with means. We look out for each other, nobody gets left behind.[/quote]

I am an AA woman and my parents paid for college and helped me with my first house. That same house, in DC, bought when I was in my 20s unmarried with no kids, appreciated and helped build wealth for me. I have friends who left college burdened by debt and are still paying on those loans and were unable to get in the market when I did, who have to do a different calculus. My parents helped me because they wanted to and they could and I am forever grateful to them and I pay it back and forward in many tangible and intangible ways. Bootstrap people seem to want life to be hard for no good reason other than it should be, in their opinion. [/quote]

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