Reply to Why do people care if adult children receive help from their parents/family?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Not really jealousy so much as it's kind of sad that an adult still needs help from their parents, especially if you grew up without anyone helping you. Sure, I'll help my kids out if they really really need it, but if they just want nice things and can't afford it and expect me to pay for it, then no.  Live within your  means.  That's the best gift I can give them.. to be self sufficient as an adult and knowing how to live within your means.[/quote]

You are missing it. I am a poster upthread gifting my kids either a paid off house or a very large down payment. It will not be because they "really really need" it. It will be because I want to and because I was given a great head start by my parents, who set me up for success, I'm going to give my kids that same gift. I hope they don't really really need it. I just KNOW what an advantage young adults have whose parents pay for 6 years of their education and help them buy their first home.

I'm an American Jew and this is actually pretty normal in my community for those with means. We look out for each other, nobody gets left behind.[/quote]

My parents paid for my college education and gave me $1,000 for graduate school. That's all the head start I needed and I'm incredibly grateful. From that point on until they passed away I never received monetary gifts or aid from them and I never needed it. For estate planning purposes I'm giving my kids money but it is going into trusts, not into their checking accounts. They are all doing very well on their own and don't need an additional advantage. But if they ever had a real need I'd be there for them in a minute.[/quote]

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