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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]You have every right to be upset, but not surprised.

When someone shows you who they are: believe them!

Keep your distance. This will continue if you continue to see or speak with her.[/quote]

My husband loves and adores his family. Since he was probably an abused child, he is sort of oblivious and doesn't get phased by her psychotic episodes. Wouldn't it be rude if I stop going over? I hate her but always go over and am polite just to show face and not create drama. Once I stop going they will have real reason to hate me. Right now they're grasping at straws.[/quote]

I think it's actually bigger than that, OP. Play this scenario forward a few years. Add children, since I assume you want children. How will your in-laws treat your children? If you don't think that your MIL is going to undermine everything you do with your child, if you don't think those children will be used as weapons against you, think again. That is exactly how it will go. And since your husband is already inclined to downplay the severity of your MIL and SIL's behavior, don't expect that he will defend you to them. He said he will side with you against them, but then when given the opportunity to shut his mother down, he didn't do that. My husband would have shut his mother down after the first incident. After the proposal, we would not have seen those people again, full stop. That's what choosing you means when the family is so hostile. He has not done that.

In your position, I would serious reconsider this marriage. You may love him, but for better or worse, you married the family.[/quote]

The reason I have been apprehensive about bringing children into this marriage is [b]because of his MIL and SIL.[/b] I am petrified of their behavior around my future children and just the general awkward, unfriendly hostile environment.

My DH thinks all of this is normal and is just happy to receive any morsel of attention or affection from his mother. I have told him my concerns about his mother and he has told me that if I intend to keep our future kids away from his family then he'd rather not have children with me.

He did tell me he will take my side but over time he is expecting me to just roll with it and "ignore them" like he does. He thinks I am crazy and too serious and never let anything go. That may be but every encounter I have with them heightens my anxiety. I also desperately feel alone and battered. 
[/quote]

So how do they stack up against Indian in-laws OP?  I've read that in India DILs are pretty much servants to DH's parents. 
Also, you're a drama queen as much as your MIL, maybe minus the drinking. you found your match it seems.[/quote]

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