Reply to If you are only comfortable having sex in an exclusive relationship.....

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "If you are only comfortable having sex in an exclusive relationship....."

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Op here. The other difference between these guys and the guys before is that these guys are divorced. Because of my age, that's most of my available dating pool. Guys were divorced between 3 months, a year, and 3 years. Is this a "divorced guy" thing? It's like they feel entitled to my body without putting in the effort needed when dating and building a relationship. [/quote]

I think in general a recently divorced guy does not want to be an another exclusive relationship anytime soon.  You probably want to screen at least 2-3 years post divorce.  The fact that you would like to get married someday is likely a turnoff to someone that has just gotten out of a marriage.  Some of my female friends have divorced with kids and I would say it’s 50/50 if they ever want to remarry and first year post divorce no one wanted a serious relationship.

I guess for OP, have you ever been married?  Do you have kids, want kids, willing to be a step mom?  There may be some compatibility issues around want you want and want these guys want long-term.  So I would say exclusivity is weeding out the guys that you aren’t on the same page long term but you should be doing more of that before the questions of sex and exclusivity are coming up. You are assuming it’s all about sex but I think it really is about finding the guy that wants the same things that you want in life.  If the guy never wants to remarry or would wait until his 5 year old is out the house at 18, it doesn’t matter if you are exclusive or not because you don’t want the same things.  Why would you even want to ask him to be exclusive?  If it’s just to have sex with someone in a monogamous relationship that you know will go no where, what’s the point?  Usually the sex with someone you are comfortable with that will go nowehere is a FWB type relationship or people have a one off with an ex.   I’m not saying to go out and just start sleeping with guys hoping it would lead to exclusivity, rather take a closer look at who you are want to date exclusively and make sure you aren’t just making the push because of your high sex drive when they actually are not a good match for you for a long-term relationship.[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics