Reply to therapy or other guidance re: stopping anorexia in its tracks

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[quote=Anonymous]I’m 13:51 and I’m sorry, I wrote that after just reading your first post. I hadn’t read all the follow ups. She is truly lucky to have you in her life as a source of support, and you sound like an amazing and kind stepmom. From your follow ups she clearly has an ED and is in need of treatment- it wasn’t really clear from your first post.

It’s good you did catch it early, and that you are taking it seriously.  There is so much that sounded familiar from your posts, in terms of the family dynamics, and relationships.  You are in a difficult position. I have partly been there,and honestly I wasn’t as emotionally mature and strong as you are to be able to handle it well.  I was not related by blood but I was the one she confided the severity of her illness too, while the rest of her family seemed oddly in denial about it all.  In that position I felt it was my responsibility to save her, and be vigilant for her because no one else would.

Just exercise caution... make sure your DH takes on more of a supportive role, don’t let him take a backseat. Make sure she has a good individual therapist. What I mean is, don’t take on this whole entire beast by yourself. And it IS a beast. Make sure you get therapy. One drawback of the maudsley method is that it creates this dynamic, where YOU become so involved in HER eating and her well-being. And while I can see it leads to success in getting back to a healthy state, IMO it creates an unhealthy dynamic with the family that is centered so much around the illness.

She wants you to be the hero and you want to be the hero for her. But just be realistic about your own limitations. You are only human.[/quote]

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