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[quote=Anonymous]Really surprised how this thread has emphasized the incompatibility in sexual appetite and completely ignored the ginormous lies - to two key relationships, wife and good friend - the DH must have had to tell to be able to carry on his affair.

There is no possibility to address any sexual incompatibility when one person is lying about their sexual needs and behavior.

OP, this marriage is likely over not because there is sexual incompatibility, but because one partner has a demonstrated pattern of dealing with sexual incompatibility by lying and covering up.

The odds that your DH can summon the tremendous will and insight that it takes to talk about and negotiate sexual incompatibility (both his for you and yours for him) are extremely slim.  People always focus on whether the affair details were voluntarily disclosed, because voluntary disclosure is reflective ability to tell (and hear) unpalatable truths, and that is the same quality necessary to fix a ruptured relationship. [/quote]

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