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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]What if you dropped the cleaning lady and your wife added some more part time hours? Would that help with finances?

[b]It really makes a difference for middle and high school kids to have a parent home in the afternoon for a lot of reasons, so that is another aspect to keep in mind.[/b]
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Please take this to heart. It is true and very important [/quote]

I have two kids out of college and on their own. Two in college. One high school senior.  It is really important to have a parent home in the afternoons and evenings when you have teens.  I know not everyone can do it.  But if you can, it really matters. If I had to choose, I would work during the elementary grades and stay at home during middle and high school. I'm grateful that I was able to be at home. [/quote]

What do you have of importance to do now?  It sounds nice in some ways, but giving up a professional life is a high price to pay.  We hire an afternoon sitter/driver for our teen and tween.[/quote]

A driver or an afternoon sitter was not what we wanted for our teens. We wanted a parent home in the afternoons. A sitter isn't the same as a parent. The teen years can be tough. I've seen too many really bad outcomes. We managed to raise five children without any drug or alcohol issues, pregnancy scares, bad grades, etc. I believe having a parent at home helped.

What "do I have of importance now"?  I'm actually not sure what that means. I still work part time and I love my work. My DH and I are 50. He retires at 55. We have a wonderful life together. We travel a lot to see our kids. We have a brand new grandbaby. We sail to the Bahamas every year. We are excited about doing more traveling when my DH retires. We are both involved in our church. We are active in our community.  We have a large garden and grow much of our own food. We both enjoy our paid work, but it has never been what defines either one of us.  If work is the thing that gives you your greatest sense of purpose, you may be in for some tough times when you retire. [/quote]

What is your HHI?[/quote]

They don't live in Dc.

Their bar for success is ridiculously low: avoid drugs alcohol, pregnancy, and flunking out.  This is not DC. I would guess there was alcohol but kids were discrete.  I know MANY working parents who achieved same outcomes. But in lower income areas it is much harder. 
Grand'baby' at 50 - crazy young and who says grandbaby: southerners 
Traveling to see kids means driving to Atlanta
Sailing to Bahamas? From Annapolis -- no.

They live FL or GA I think. [/quote]

Huh?  I live in neither. We live in Burke most of the time, although we are TDY now.  We have also lived in DC and in MOCO. My kids went to Lake Braddock. My standards are very high. I have a National Merit Scholar.  Four college grads. I think my kids have done great. I'm very proud of them.  We own a home in Ponte Vedra, Florida and sail from there.  I had my oldest at 22. We are young grandparents.  Happily married for close to 30 years. I'm not sure exactly what you are looking for.  Oh, the HHI. We are not wealthy. $180,000.

You don't need to put others down to make yourself feel better. I was clear that this was a choice that worked for our family. If my DH's job were less demanding, I might have made different choices. I hope whatever you are so bitter about gets better. And I mean that sincerely. [/quote]

Wasn't bitter.  I am from the south and what you described sounded just like my friends back home.

Impressed you bought a home st 22, that definitely paid off. [/quote]

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