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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I liked this episode, because it starts to point to something that's always bothered me. Jack has, from the first episode, always felt domineering to me. So the general "swoon"-iness around him always confused me. I think showing how Randall is similar and directly comparing it to Jack's treatment of Rebecca is good. It means the show really does understand the nuances of its characters.

It'll be interesting to see how all this plays out. The last few episodes have revealed how much more there is to Beth's past...which makes her current marginalization so much more enraging. I do see how Beth contributed to that, but I guess I'm a little more sympathetic to the person struggling to find space for herself than the person who just won't let her.[/quote]

Good point about Jack.

I think it’s also revealing that her “strength” isnt really all that.  She was dominated by her mother, and she caves in to be the good girl pretty quickly. [b]It’s like there’s a disconnect between her and everyone else’s sense of her strength and how she actually is.[/b][/quote]
As a Black woman, this statement really resonates with me. I get the Beth storyline 100%. So many white women say to me “I wish I had your strength.”  “I’m so intimidated by you!”  “You’re so strong.”  “I’m afraid of you!”  I cannot for the life of me understand that. I’m actually very shy and lack confidence. I think white people confuse speaking your mind with inner strength. I’m not afraid to tell the truth (sometimes to my detriment) but that doesn’t mean that I am this pillar of strength not worthy of empathy and compassion. I don’t consider myself meek or a doormat but I’m actually not that tough and I’m definitely not an angry Black woman with a venoumous disposition. The whole Beth and Randall storyline mirrors my current life; supporting a spouse with high anxiety, finding my place and my voice in my marriage, overbearing mother who did not support my dream, a dream deferred, being consumed by your life, getting laid off,  etc... It’s a great storyline for me for personal reasons and I think the writers have done a really good job showing the nuances of Black life. It’s refreshing and honest. [/quote]

I want to second this (although my DH doesn’t have anxiety, he’s got trust and abandonment issues). I don’t think of myself as strong so much as adaptable. I have adapted to struggle and pain because the only other choice was to not survive. I’m sure I would have flourished without the burdens of racism, sexism, and dysfunctional family life as a child. [/quote]

+1 I think I understand what you ladies are talking about. It's nice to know others feel similarly. When I would be told how strong I am, to continue being strong, how my strength is inspiring, they could never be as strong as I am... blah blah - I remember feeling so disconnected from those traits. I wasn't strong, I just wasn't [i]done[/i]. I was continuing on because that's the option that I have, to continue living or surrender to being a shell of a person. I didn't pick shell, but I don't think that makes me strong. Maybe lucky. [/quote]

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