Reply to Are you offended when someone says they “didnt want someone else to raise my kids”?

Forum Index » General Parenting Discussion

Reply to "Are you offended when someone says they “didnt want someone else to raise my kids”?"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Please I beg of you:

Could we stop talking about staying home versus working as a "choice" that all wome make?

It's not except for a tiny sliver of very privileged women who truly can work or stay home with no financial or personal repercussions either way. For everyone else the scales tend to be heavily weighted one way or another and even when you get to pick there are major trade-offs because you don't have the resources to mitigate the downsides.

THIS is why it's rude to say things that pass judgment on what other women do. Because for most women it's not truly a choice. The majority of us are constrained by economics and earning potential and childcare availability and the nature of our marriages and the support systems we have in place (and not you cannot just "choose" to have a great support system -- some people have supportive families and communities and others don't due to circumstance not choice).

So yes please be sensitive when you talk about this issue because a lot of women are doing the very best they can with the options available to them (which are not limitless) and no one needs to be shamed or shaded for working OR staying home.

If women could just have empathy towards each other we would all be so much better off.[/quote]

And let’s stop pretending most SAHM are employable. [/quote]

Thank you for proving my point for me. Who does this comment help?

And guess what? There probably are people who are better stay at home parents than they are paid workers. Why is this a bad thing? Caring for children is important work (whoever takes care of your kids while you work is pretty important to you right?) so if someone decides they can be more useful by staying home with their kids than going to a job with a paycheck then why would you oppose that?

There are also plenty of women who decide to stay home for a few years because the economics of incomes in their field and the cost of childcare where they live just doesn't add up. Now you might ask yourself "well why don't more men do this?" Excellent question! There are several reasons including:

- men make more money than women on average and thus it is less likely to make sense for a man to stay home and care for kids

- people like you stigmatize staying home to care for children by making fun of women who do it and men are even more sensitive to the loss of social status that would come from choosing to stay home with their children so they won't do it because people [LIKE YOU] will think less on them

But you don't understand that fixing the above is way more important than running around making fun of sahms if you care about womens rights and equality. Tell me again who is dumbe -- you or the sahms?[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics