Reply to New STA parent seeking advice, suggestions, or just plain "I wish I had known X" info

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I am the poster that posted about the Halloween party. It was not my son as I've said several times. I am regretting posting it. The parent of the boy would never mention it to the parent, as they're not approachable and they were worried it would make it worse for their son. I posted it because that is not the STA I have known and loved so when I heard about it it upset me, especially because it seems to be a trend in the same circles and I'm hoping if attention is brought to it it will stop. I will follow up by saying STA is such an amazing school and the school really does all it can to create a community and most of the community really is kind and wonderful to one another. School needs to pull aside the parents and kids not abiding by the community values and let them know it will not be tolerated. [/quote]

Well, STA has no way of knowing about this incident unless a parent tells them.  And it's awkward to do it if it's your kid.  If you feel so strongly about this, did you share wi any of the STA administrators?  If not, then you have no right to say the school should have done something.  [/quote]

I am not the poster to whom you are responding but I must say your tone is really snarky and not helpful. No one is blaming Sta if you read the posts clearly. The post was speaking in general terms about anytime these incidents happened with parents or if boys are known to be social bullies they just need to be addressed.[/quote]

Sounds like you missed this sentence:

[b]School needs to pull aside the parents and kids not abiding by the community values and let them know it will not be tolerated.[/b]

That is blaming STA.

I'm tired of people coming onto anonymous fora and saying that a school should do X or Y when they haven't acted like adults and had a real conversation with anyone at the school in a position to do anything about it.  In multiple threads, including this one, STA is bashed for the poor behavior of a few outliers.  In many cases -- as in this one, which involves a private party that took place outside of school hours -- ther is no way the school administration could know anything about it unless a parent or student alerted them to what occurred.

The previous poster made it clear that the parent of the excluded child did not want to "make things worse" for their child.  It sounds like they dropped it.  The other parents would have absolutely no way of knowing that a kid was singled out and not invited, unless they were explicitly told. There is never 100% attendance at any party.  If some kids aren't there, most people would simply assume they had something else to do that night.  So, unless the excluded boy, his parents, or one of their friends were willing to talk to the school administration, there is no way for them to know about what happened.  And saying that the school should "intervene," when you haven't been willing to talk to anyone in a position of authority is  immature and irresponsible.

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