Reply to Can someone explain the mindset of a cheater?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote] My cheater was just diagnosed as a clinical narcissist with histrionic disorder. Two opinions, extensive testing. Same diagnosis.[/quote]

In other posts, you have described your husband (generally) as personable and well-liked.  It’s weird you are just finding out after 20 years of marriage that he’s a narcissist.  Narcissists are usually really hard to live with - they are always right, everything is about them, etc.  Seems like it would show up through more than just cheating (not underplaying they cheating, which is traumatic).[/quote]

Some are master manipulators.  There are different types- not all are malignant narcissists.  Tests differentiate the strains and variances.  I have a 30 page medical diagnosis in my lap.

And—some are so skilled they beat polygraph tests and full their therapists.  The charm effect with zero empathy.  They learn how to “act empathetic” but the feelings aren’t there.

Additionally, in terms of childhood issues/parental as a factor it does tend to peak in 40s.

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