Reply to 3rd grader tickles & calls out

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]If this were my kid, and I was sure it was behavioral... for the tickling, every time, he needs to be isolated. It is not ok to put your hands on someone else without their consent. When is he doing it? If it's while standing in line, then he needs to have things in his hands while standing in line so he can't tickle other kids. If it's at recess, then he can walk laps and stay away from the other kids for the rest of recess once he does it. There is no benefit, it is hammered in that if he tickles, he is not going to be having fun (since he doesn't seem to grasp that other people's feelings matter).

For shouting out, he'd get 3 coins. Every time he shouted out, he'd lose a coin. At the end of the day, he'd get a bonus of some sort for any coins he had left. Increase that to needing some number of coins at the end of a week, then gradually increase the needed number of coins, and fade it out. If he writes well, give him a notebook and let him write down all his thoughts in it. He might be worried he's going to forget something important if he doesn't say it immediately.

These approaches all require working with the teacher. But I also suggest you consider if he's not being handsy inappropriately in life outside of school. He's not hugging everyone? Sitting on laps all the time? Resting against people? I'd be surprised if he's not getting his touching needs met in some way. If he is, you might want to set up approved touching activities. Start giving each other a big hug when you see him after school, and go through a formal ask-and-accept before doing it. Play wrestling or other active, physical things can help kids who need physical contact. Swimming was amazing for one of my children.

I'd also look to see other areas where he might be calling out at home. Does he interrupt? If you're on the phone and he needs you, does he wait? What about when you and your spouse are talking? It would surprise me if he's the model of restraint at home and only shouts out at school. You can use the same token method for interrupting at home and it should help him at school as well.[/quote]

OP here. Great response, Thank you.

Today is the first day at school since the incident where we have laid out black and white rules about touching classmates. He seems to do it at recess according to an email I got from his teacher and not in class. He calls out so he can be the first to be correct or he will call out to correct someone. I don't think it's a "problem" in the clinical sense. I truly believe he just feels the need to be right. I'm not a professional or anything and maybe there IS another reason. He does not interrupt anyone at home but is frustrated if classmates are playing a game the "RIGHT WAY" or they aren't doing an assignment the "RIGHT WAY". I've repeatedly (until I'm blue in the face) told him to worry about himself and no one else in regards to correcting others. He comes in with "well actually..." a lot because he thinks he knows best. He's 8! He has a lot of learning to do. He just thinks he knows it all, lol.

In regards to touching at home, he loves to get and give hugs. When was younger, he used to try to sit on people or lay on them without asking and I corrected it by saying that others might not be comfortable with it and you need to ask..which he does generally. [/quote]

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