Reply to Why do people refuse to be realistic about the consequences of long term relationships?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]We were 25 and 26 when we got engaged. Nobody told us what would happen.

What should they have said? "Monogamy is boring. Don't do it." ???[/quote]

What planet are you living on?? LOL. People say this ALLLLL the damn time. No one listens. Then they end up in this same situation in their late thirties or forties and look around like they are the first person this ever happened to. Never fails.[/quote]

Well, yes, people are saying it. But not too newlyweds. Not in places that 20-somethings are looking. Would you tell a 27 year old that she was going to be bored in just 10 short years? But will have another 40 years with her spouse? No. That's a rotten wedding gift.[/quote]
[b]
Well, and even when young people express hesitation about getting married, people gloss over all of that and encourage them to get married.  It's the same with having kids.

People will complain in certain circles, but they won't around people who aren't married or who don't have kids.  Or they'll complain but with the caveat "it's still the best thing I ever did!"[/b]

I just think as a society, we aren't very tolerant of people who suspect marriage and/or kids aren't for them -- especially women.  I also think that we have kind of accepted as gospel that women *naturally* lose their sex drive, and so we assume that in marriage, if a woman loses interest in her spouse, that's totally normal.  Have there actually been studies about this?  I mean, comparing single women to married women and sex drive?  I just think that it's a very complex thing, but we downplay the complexity and just go along with certain old, entrenched views.[/quote]

They might mean it though. Very few worthwhile things can be had in life without any effort needing to be put in.[/quote]

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