Reply to What mattered with your kids in the long run?

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]i want to answer this for myself. (I'm in my 40s, parents in their 70s). The thing that made a huge difference was my parents paying for my college education. I know that was a long time ago and it makes me incredibly sad that doing this now is beyond the reach of almost every middle class family. My parents were government employees from large immigrant families who came to this country with nothing; they sacrificed a lot to put me and my siblings through school. Leaving college without debt enabled me to choose a career in public service and still support my family. It has let me have jobs I love where I feel like I am making a difference.

I know many will flame me for suggesting something that is about money. But I put this in the "acts of service" (5 love languages) category. When I was young I hated that my parents were so strict, that they didn't talk with me the way other american parents did. But since becoming a parent myself and through growing older I learned to understand how they were expressing their love and to value what a gift it was that they gave me.

In other words, I think as long as you keep trying from a place of love to do what is best for your child hopefully they will understand it in the end. It may not always make them happy with you in a specific moment but hopefully it will help them feel valued and cherished. [/quote]

My parents did this too and we are doing it for our children.  My parents were also the strict parents on the block.  The other kids onthe block heard, "If Larla's parents say yes, then you can go".  [/quote]

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