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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I usually say trust your gut, but in this case MY gut is telling that the problem is you, OP.

I got uncomfortable just reading about the level of detail you have on your husband's life.  You know the names of consultants he talks to for his job? You go to the same doctor seeking the same procedure?  You track what time he goes to lunch, where he goes, and what time he returns?  That's just unnatural.

Worse, you jump to thinking about divorce before you actually talk to him?  Find a therapist first.[/quote]

"Do you want to go to lunch today? I can't go until one because I have to talk to my local counsel about that case I have in California at noon our time?"

Then when he texted me an hour after we were supposed to have lunch, I asked playfully (as was suggested after the JJs incident) "who kept you on the phone so long?" and he said "Bob Smith from [local DC firm]."

I don't track when he goes to lunch. He told me he was going to JJs. He asked me to go to lunch with him on Friday. So two days out of what, 40, I knew his lunch plans.

The medical procedure is a pilar cyst removal. He had his done first, and when I saw it wasn't a horrific recovery, I decided to have mine done too, so I went to the same doctor he went to. No different than asking DCUM for the recommendation of an OB or endocrinologist, which comes up every day.

I really do not think I am overly controlling here.[/quote]

Not PP, and I don't think you sound controlling. But I do think your husband doesn't necessarily sound like he's hiding something...it seems like he's fairly forthcoming with all of this stuff. The call that was to CA probably happened as scheduled, and he was then held up talking to this other guy in DC. You asked who held him up so long, and he answered truthfully. The doctor's visit thing where he took leave to "recover"...is that even a lie if he just wants to take a couple of days off? I'm not saying he couldn't be cheating, I just don't think that these things alone indicate that. I don't think this is the same thing as when women come on here asking about finding a dating app on their husband's phone, or condoms in his gym bag or whatever, and people twist themselves into knots trying to give innocent reasons for those things. The things you've described here, in my opinion, could actually have innocent explanations.[/quote]

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