Reply to DW has incredibly low sex drive - not sure what can be done to help

Forum Index » Relationship Discussion (non-explicit)

Reply to "DW has incredibly low sex drive - not sure what can be done to help"

Subject:

Emoticons





More smilies

Text Color: Font: Close Marks

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]Demand sex? Yes, marriage is supposed to be a sexual relationship. Sex is a legitimate and normal need and while it is sad that one must elevate to making "demands" in order to be taken seriously, that is a logical next step.

Cheat? I would not call it cheating if a wife refuses to participate in the physical intimacy of a normal marriage. One cannot both demand monogamy and deny sex at the same time. [/quote]

Oh please never an excuse to cheat, women do it to and it's just as wrong. He won't help enough around the house, doesn't take out the garbage, doesn't help with the kids..blah blah.  Yes both need to be monogamous.  There are choices, compromise, counseling, or get divorced and then date. No one has the right to expose someone to a deadly disease or bring some outsider nut upon their family.

OP sounds like a nice guy, overall it's seems like a good marriage. I believe he said they are in their 50's.  As you age, the attraction may not be there. I had a few older friends and they weren't interested in men over 45-50 physically though they loved their husbands. That's why some older men pick young women because they wouldn't be attracted to women their age. The younger ones want the money and the older guy is ok paying for that.

I suspect OP's wife isn't attracted, nothing can change that.

[/quote]

This is probably spot-on.

I don't know how old OP's DW is, but can tell you that at 55yo I have lost most interest in sex.  From an evolutionary standpoint this seems logical to me.

[b]I often wonder why there are so many proposed fixes for women with low libidos to make them want sex, and no proposed fixes for men with higher libidos to make them want less sex. [b] [/quote]

Because a regular sexual relationship is wonderful and fulfilling. You have that kind of relationship usually with just one person and it's special and wonderful?
Why would you want to take that away? You sound very far gone![/quote]

I'm not far-gone.  I am just a menopausal woman without much interest in sex.

I'm fine with occasional maintenance sex, it's not like I've thrown in the towel for good.  I am not fine, however, with being told that I have to want it, be more enthusiastic, be more [whatever].  I'll compromise and expect some compromise in return.[/quote]

You're just like my AP's wife. He thought he'd made peace with having only maintenance sex the rest of his life, but then we got together and surprise!  a passionate, romantic, creative sex life that both people are enthusiastic about is infinitely more fulfilling. Your poor husband.[/quote]

Ha, same guy keeps posting his fantasy. For heaven's sake if you're married or committed get divorced or breakup and date.[/quote]

I truly think some men think this is the penthouse forum and the place here they can write their fantasies.

And.. surprise, surprise... it usually involves a man getting lots of sexy sexy times and the mean old woman who wouldnt have sex with him ending up lonely and regretting how cruel she was....
[/quote]

It's quite sad imo. That someone suggested a prescription is beyond belief. My doctor tells us you want to stay off as many meds as possible since almost all have side effects. To try and have their wife take a pill because she doesn't want to have sex is big time denial.[/quote]

Oh no, but dont you realize?  Men's sexual satisfaction is so much more important than women's health.

Actually, testosterone has been proven to take as many as ten years off a woman's life.

But it is TOTALLY WORTH that missed decade when you think that her husband will get to be regularly laid.  I mean, hello!!!
[/quote]

Options

	Disable HTML in this message
	Disable BB Code in this message
	Disable smilies in this message

Review message

Search Recent Topics Hottest Topics