Reply to DW has incredibly low sex drive - not sure what can be done to help

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[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]"What is prompting me to write this is that I was just rejected again as I reached over to try and initiate something, anything. I got the good old...I'm too tired...Need to get some sleep..."

So, this may be your problem.

Imaging her writing this post:

I've done my wind down from the busy day, read to get my mind off of everything, slip slowly into the bliss of sweet sleep in my comfy bed, giant dreamy smile of content on my face, I'm drifting off ... then, out of the blue, a hand plops onto my hip implying, wake up and get your motor running NOW!

That is a huge downer.

Change up your routine. Turn her on before she turns it off for the night. Make an effort to turn her on, and not when she's half asleep. Women do not have on/off switches; you need to ramp it up.

The reason she is there for you in the morning shower is that she is awake![/quote]

This is ridiculous. Regular sex is an important part of a healthy marriage - it's an obligation. You make it sound like it's a prize awarded to a husband for good behavior.[/quote]

No, not at all. I obviously agree it is important. I disagree that one is obligated to perform on demand when one is not in the mood, let alone asleep! That would be crazy and terribly unhealthy for a marriage, to say the least. The point is that OP seems to be picking his DW's worst possible time to engage and so he isn't getting anywhere (which seems pretty obvious, so it is odd they haven't discussed this). Why on earth is he waiting until she is going to sleep? They need to find a time that works for both of them. As another PP pointed out, getting each other in the mood is a huge, healthy, and rewarding part of sex in your marriage. And as your lifestyle changes and the older you get, the more important it is, as the over-50 crowd and the newly-adjsuting-to-parenthood crowd have been pointing out.

And I have no idea where you got your last sentence from, unless you consider wooing and foreplay and changing up your bedroom (or shower) routine "good behavior" that is "rewarded" with sex ... most people consider it an important part of sex.[/quote]

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