Reply to Thanksgiving 'dynamic' and how to prevent/deal with it

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[quote=Anonymous][quote]So my question is: How do I avoid this dynamic occurring, and how do I deal with it if (and likely when) it pops up this year? 
 Things I've done/am planning to do: 
 1) Send an e-mail clarifying logistics/food "assignments" 
 2) Use place cards and make it clear that I'm sitting in the hostess seat 
 3) Make extra room in freeze and fridge, and "just deal" with the extra food dynamic as far as storage goes

[b] This is not a MIL vent, this is a known problem that I want to work on finding a good way to address/avoid. I do like her, and I don't need to be told that she raised my DH/I should be grateful/I'll be the MIL someday. Thank you! [/b][/quote]

OP I do not think this is such a small thing. [b]Your MIL pushed a pregnant hostess out of her chair![/b] You should address this directly with her (or your DH should, but obviously he wont). Don't use place cards -- just tell her. Just deal with the extra food by thanking and putting aside. Avoid putting things in writing b/c that will live forever. A face to face talk about "you are the hostess at your house, thanks! You be the hostess at YOUR house MIL..." She is way over stepping her boundaries and she knows exactly what she is doing. Best to mention it and move on, because obviously it is driving you crazy and it is inappropriate on her part. It is always best to nip these things in the bud. just be polite and TELL her. I would start with the chair. and tell her the timing emails make thins VERY awkward for the guests.

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